Li(o)ve Life

 Once again, I was watching a show last night when a comment was made that touched me. I was watching the David Bowie documentary Moonage Daydreams. In a clip of an interview with him from his later career he said "It's about living. Not the amount of time you lived, but what you did while you were here. . Do not regret the things you did not do ".  I do not want to have regrets. I want to at least pursue my dreams before I die. 

Thoughts of my death invaded my thoughts this weekend with a feeling of unease that I have not felt in a very long time. The thoughts of a tragic death intruded. I think the reason these thoughts have come to me is that for the first time in a very long time I feel I have a purpose to life. I have goals that I feel are important to achieve before I depart this earthly plain. I think I am learning to love life again and want to live it fully. To live without regrets. 

I try to live my life without any regrets. There are things I wish I had done differently, but I also know that if I had chosen a different path I would not be where I am today. I know that even though my second marriage ended very painfully, I was able to do many things I dreamed of because of it. I am the person I am today because of it. I do not know how different my life would have been had I not walked into the Greyhound pub in London on that June evening in 1995. Would it have been a easier path or one more difficult? My life would have been drastically different though, and I cannot imagine not having the people in my life that I have now if I had taken a different path. 

I feel myself growing stronger both mentally and physically on this current path. My morning workout routine has become a habit that I look forward to. My knees are getting stronger and are almost pain free. I am increasing my steps on the stair stepper a bit faster than I though I could. I am still pacing myself and holding back a bit so I don't overdo it. My goal is 300, I am a quarter of the way there at 75. I am feeling more confident I can reach my goal. I am praying that life will not throw any surprises at me as I have had more than my share over the years. This is to be my time. My time to live life, My time to love life.